You know that heavy, heartsick feeling that drags down your whole being (even though your problems are nowhere near as serious as most)? That was mine today.
When you’re 32 and single, you’ve faced a fair number of disappointments, and felt like a failure many times over.
When you’re 32 and single, probably the only girl at the family Thanksgiving who doesn’t have a ring on her finger and isn’t taking care of babies. And you wonder, Why not me?
That soft spot of the heart that is so deep and so treasured is also prone to intense aching when empty.
When you’re 32 and single, and you go on the first date in 3-and-a-half years, you find yourself timidly envisioning possibilities you’d closed your mind to indefinitely.. Those aspects of life that are never yours to share, well maybe they could be now..
When you’re 32 and single,you’re a bit more resolute and a little less prideful than in the past. Not in it to impress others, but to move toward a goal. Willing to push through a disagreement because you want this to work.
And then, when the door seems to close, you’re very heavy-hearted and don’t know what to think.. Except to realize you don’t want to be back to square one, because hopefully you’ve learned and grown and God used this short time to mold you into a better person, better toward others.
My dad shared recently, “The longer you wait, the stronger you get.” I don’t want to wait! But it’s so true. There is some measure of hope when you’re at the base looking up, when you’re looking to the Lord.
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.” – Proverbs 13:15
I believe that God has good things in store. Paradoxically, it seems harder to imagine but easier to trust God for as time goes on.
I guess it boils down to this: Do you trust God?
When you’re 32 and single, you have to trust a little harder.. But He gives you grace for that, because He is good. There is no one more trustworthy than God, so go ahead and trust Him – you couldn’t be in better hands!